heaven and hell

there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, > you see, so we">"No problem, just let me in," says the Senator.. > "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll > do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can > choose where to spend eternity." > "Really?, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the > Senator. > "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." > And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, > down, down to hell. > The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf > course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are > all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. > Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, > shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while > getting rich at the expense of the people. > They played > a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and the > finest champagne. > Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is > having a good time dancing and telling jokes. > They are all having such a good time that before the Senator realizes > it, it is time to go. > Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator > rises... > The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. > Peter is waiting for him, "Now it's time to visit heaven.." > So, 24 hours passed with the Senator joining a group of contented > souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They > have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by > and St. Peter returns. > "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now > choose your eternity." > The Senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: > "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been > delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." > So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down > to hell.. > Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren > land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed > in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more > trash falls from above. > The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders. > "I don't understand," stammers the Senator. > "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and > we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great > time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look > miserable. > What happened?" > > The devil smiles at him and says, > "Yesterday we were campaigning ... > Today, you voted.." > Vote wisely on November 6, 2012 > Fool me once shame on me, Fool me twice and we are all in BIG Trouble (via Dave Glinski)'>> HEAVEN AND HELL> > While walking down the street one day a Corrupt Senator was tragically > hit by a car and died. > His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. > "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems > there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, > you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." > "No problem, just let me in," says the Senator.. > "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll > do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can > choose where to spend eternity." > "Really?, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the > Senator. > "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." > And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, > down, down to hell. > The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf > course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are > all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. > Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, > shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while > getting rich at the expense of the people. > They played > a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and the > finest champagne. > Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is > having a good time dancing and telling jokes. > They are all having such a good time that before the Senator realizes > it, it is time to go. > Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator > rises... > The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. > Peter is waiting for him, "Now it's time to visit heaven.." > So, 24 hours passed with the Senator joining a group of contented > souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They > have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by > and St. Peter returns. > "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now > choose your eternity." > The Senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: > "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been > delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." > So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down > to hell.. > Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren > land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed > in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more > trash falls from above. > The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders. > "I don't understand," stammers the Senator. > "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and > we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great > time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look > miserable. > What happened?" > > The devil smiles at him and says, > "Yesterday we were campaigning ... > Today, you voted.." > Vote wisely on November 6, 2012 > Fool me once shame on me, Fool me twice and we are all in BIG Trouble (via Dave Glinski)

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